Friday, September 9, 2016

Journeying with the Dying

A reflection of the day after joining palliative round today. We were discussing about loneliness faced by many terminally ill patients and their care-givers.

'One of the most dreadful sufferings in life is finding no support available amidst distress. Loneliness adds more pain in the journey...'

We wonder how we should help these friends/family of ours amidst the toughest time. Our fear includes not knowing what to say, not having answer to difficult questions and fear of revealing our heartfelt sadness. We worry that we might say something not so thoughtful that will hurt them.
I recalled the same anxiety when I was about to pay last visit to my family doctor who suffered from relapsed acute leukemia.

Having gone through some of the distressed moments in grief myself, I realised that being listened to and being remembered in prayers has helped to sustain me in the challenging journey. I always found this heart-warming message whenever I met a Good Samaritan who has lent me a listening ear :'I care. I am here for you. Here is some strength of mine to go on; here is some love to energise you now when you need it so much.' We know that another fellow human friend of ours might not be able to lift away our distressed feelings, but knowing that we are cared for and respected could give us the courage and strength to walk on.

As I reflected on the experience of my last visit to my family doctor, I realised that it was of trust that he has shared with me his struggles and emotions. I appreciate that I was treasured as one of his trusted good friends in his living days. As for now, I will always remind myself: 'Be grateful to be able to share a friend's sorrow as we have been trusted and respected as friend indeed'.


May God give us the grace and strength to support those in need and may He bless all angels that we meet in life. 

-Written on 27th October 2014

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